Dollhouse, indeed. (courtesy of screenjunkies.com)
Well, for those of you that have listened to the podcast for this week, Pete and I promised to share with you our lists of the best things on Netflix Instant right now. For those of you still complaining about the fact that your rate went up 60%, when was the last time you actually sent back and received a new DVD from Netflix? Yeah, me neither. So downgrade to the Instant plan, save yourself a couple of bucks, and heed our excellent advice below so that you have hours upon hours of entertainment at your cheap-assed fingertips. Also, let’s get the dialogue going and share your favorites below!
Pete’s Picks
The Good
The IT Crowd – Consistently funny BBC program about to enter its 5th series. Do your internal laugh track a favor and check it out, if you haven’t already.
It’s a Bikini World – One of the last of the ‘Beach’ movies from the 60s, this one just has some crazy, campy charm to it. No Frankie and Annette, but rather Deborah Walley and Tommy Kirk, who pulls a Peter Brady and tries to be two guys at once to win the girl. This flick also features a few random music performances by some decent acts of the day, most notably the Animals doing ‘We Gotta Get Out of This Place’, The Castaways performing ‘Liar, Liar’ and The Gentrys, featuring a young Mouth of the South, Jimmy Hart! I shit you not. There are also go-go dancers, girls dancing in bikinis and Sid Haig, who some may know as Captain Spaulding from Rob Zombie’s ‘The Devil’s Rejects’ and ‘House of 1000 Corpses’. And, in another bit of trivia, Bobby Pickett stars as Tommy Kirk’s best friend Woody. His claim to fame? He recorded ‘Monster Mash’. The plot is irrelevant, but if you’ve ever had any desire to watch a ‘Beach’ movie or just interested in catching a slice of a bygone era, check this one out. I’ve seen this thing a few times now and it’s always fascinating. Go daddy-o!
The Eh
Black Death – Dark and possibly supernatural tale starring everyone’s favorite chain mail/codpiece wearer, Sean Bean, about a group of knights sent by the Church to investigate a town in the forest that has somehow avoided being afflicted by the plague. Maybe they just had the number of a really good plumber. Shot in Germany, ‘Black Death’ is suitably moody and features some inspired cinematography, but it ultimately fizzles as it reaches the third act. The epilogue is a bit intriguing, however. I wish I could recommend this more, but as it is, it’s a rainy Sunday time waster.
The Ugly
Bloodsport 4 – Don’t ask what happened to Bloodsport’s 2 and 3. While you’re at it, don’t ask what happens in ‘Bloodsport 4’ either. Laughably bad and done on the cheap, Daniel Bernhardt is a poor man’s Van Damme. One might go so far as to say a penniless man’s Van Damme. Bonus points for the director attempting to pass off the obvious Eastern European locations as America and Bernhardt’s detective partner and apparent love interest belting out ‘I love you!’ as she sits alone, drinking herself into a stupor because she believes he’s been killed. This happens moments after she tells her boss in no uncertain terms there’s no way he’s dead. There are a few roundhouse kicks and something resembling a prison kumite in this, but by that point I was dangerously close to getting a visit by the ghost of Kevorkians past.
100 Tears – My attempt to enjoy a bad slasher film was foiled by this ridiculous mess of a movie that blew all its budget on karo syrup. Wanna know how to de-creepify clowns? Watch this movie. The killer clown uses a cleaver that’s half the size of his body, which could generously be described as the opposite of slim. The blood flows freely and body parts fly, but it’s more laughable than scary. There is no tension. The clown does this weird head tilt after he’s hacked another victim that’s supposed to echo Michael Myers, but the actor can’t pull it off and it looks more like he’s got a pinched nerve in his neck. The director’s attempt to portray the ‘easy banter’ between the male and female co-leads, who are reporters tracking down the killer clown story, is to have the guy rip a fart in the woman’s face as she’s doing crunches on the floor of his apartment. Her response is to threaten to take a shit on his pillow. That about sums it up. The guy looks like the lead singer from Smash Mouth after a 12-hour shift at Country Buffet and the woman is a semi-hot lady of Greek descent. We’re supposed to believe there may be something going on between the two, although thank Christ it’s never shown on screen. This is not so bad it’s good. This is so bad why are my eyes bleeding?
Bob’s Picks
Top 10
Macgyver – one of the defining TV shows of my childhood and should be of yours (shaking fist).
Psych – just a feel good show that is well acted, well written, and always enjoyable.
The Sting – Newman, Redford, that is all you need to know.
Futurama – constantly underrated and miscompared to the Simpsons, but this is a good show in its own right.
Die Hard – simply one of the best action movies of all time.
Scrubs – again, well-written, well-acted, and quirky enough to keep you coming back. Plus, Sarah Chalke.
Kick-Ass – if you haven’t seen this yet, stop reading this article and watch Sherlock . . . then Kick-Ass.
The Stand – one of the best mini-series and book adaptations of all time. Still stands up.
Lost – seasons 1-4 are as good as nearly anything ever put on TV.
Honorable Mention
Kids in the Hall – classic sketch-comedy from Canada. Good for them.
Archer – simply one of the funniest shows (not cartoons) on TV.
Drawn Together – formerly one of the funniest shows on TV.
Dollhouse – Joss Whedon never quite gets his due, but this was vastly underrated. Plus, Eliza Dushku.
Next Up on the Wish List
Dr. Who
Friday Night Lights
Four Lions
Parks and Rec
Luther
Ken Burns’ Baseball
The Danger Blog 